It's not even like I like the taste of it all that much--although over the years I've really honed in on that 'acquired taste.' Usually if it takes you getting over not liking it the first several times you try it, then it might not ever need to be 'acquired.' Also if you have to douse it in sugar or it requires a chaser, maybe you shouldn't be bothering with it in the first place. But what is sort of funny is now that I've made this declaration I feel like I notice it pushed everywhere. It's like when you think you might be pregnant and then you all of a sudden you notice pregnant women and babies everywhere.
Just watching t.v. or taking my dog on a walk and I'm inundated with references, advertisements and new bars just seem to pop up out of the blue. Yesterday a noodle shop, today a bar/lounge. True story. My grocery store has holiday window paintings that include two larger than life martini and cocktail glasses painted at different angles like the glasses themselves can't contain themselves from having a good time, dancing along with the holly in the window. Restaurants have permanent advertisements cemented into their windows proudly telling all that they carry that kind of beer. 'Food is fine, but the alcohol is better' sort of thing.
Embarrassingly enough, I was recently watching MTV's new show The City and just about every scene started with a camera shot on a drink, being poured, toasted, etc.--and this is marketed to teens as the 'glamourous, good life in NYC.' I know that over the past three years that I've been here I've romanticized about being carefree, young, and partying into the wee hours of the night. But it never payed off.
Alcohol really does seem to be placed here specifically to keep us from thinking too much and organizing to overcome that which eats at us. I know that's what it did for me--wasn't happy at work, drink a crap ton and you'll forget about that--you'll also forget to solve the problem, too. Just put your hands over your ears, close your eyes and yell loudly so you can ignore everything thats going on that you would like to forget--just like a child having a tantrum. The next day you feel so bad that you're registered equally as useless and then it's back to work. 'Oh fuck work and all this bullshit, lets just go get stupid drunk,' and on it goes until you look up and realize all the time, money and brain cells you've wasted.
It had become such a matter of habit--going to the park, who can grab some beer, careful, gotta hide it from the cops. Going to over to a friends house on a weeknight, grab two bottles of wine--just to be sure that we don't run out before we are ready. Movie theatre? Sneak in a jumbo bottle of wine for the two of you, or load that purse with a six pack of tall-boys. Feeling tense? Fat? Bored? Drink up. Face the facts tomorrow- they'll still be there and hopefully you will, too.
It's funny, too, that it's only been 5 days but I feel like it's been a month--not because I'm jonesing for a drink but because I've consciously decided to make a change and that feels immense--and great.
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